Apocalypse escapism

A commercial for the famed BlissTonica. Why not try some today!

Do you ever feel overwhelmed by the gathering storm at the end times?

Do you cringe or cry out when the sky tears open that little bit further, while the ground bubbles and cracks with deathly intent?

Can you envision yourself falling into the void like a wailing pig just as all your neighbours did?

Is waiting for the inevitable, killing you slowly, knowing the only alternative is death itself?

Well fret no more!!

Try a dose of BlissTonica, on special offer for a limited period only (until our collective extinction).

Drink just one half glass and feel results immediately.

What’s it like to live in an abstract painting while everything around you burns? Drink BlissTonica to find out.

Grubbing around desperately for a morsel of sustenance? Drink BlissTonica and you’ll eat your own limbs, free of self-disgust and unendurable agony!

What’s that horrendous monstrous noise crawling its way up from the belly of an underworld? Drink BlissTonica and never have to find out!

Drink BlissTonica.

It’s just better this way.